


Hanukkah is Over

by bansheee



Category: Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: Christmas, Excessive use of 'The Tumblr', Friendship, Hanukkah, Leah POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-28
Updated: 2017-08-28
Packaged: 2018-12-20 23:30:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11931618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bansheee/pseuds/bansheee
Summary: “Oh.Fuck.”





	Hanukkah is Over

“Oh. _Fuck_.”  
  
Leah stared at her phone screen, at the very first post on her Tumblr dash. Specifically, at her best friend’s name. Her heart felt like it was in her throat.  
  
“What?” Nick asked. He didn't look away from his game on the TV.  
  
When she didn’t answer, Leah heard Nick mumble something into his headset. Leah didn’t look to him. She couldn’t look away from her phone.  
  
“Hey guys, I have to go,” Nick said into the headset. Leah could hear Garrett and Bram’s protests through the headset. On the screen, all three of their characters died. Nick tugged his headset off and sat up. “What’s wrong?”  
  
Leah handed him her phone, and watched his eyebrows furrow. She knew how much he already hated the Creeksecrets Tumblr page. “Come on, Leah.”  
  
“Just fucking read it, Nick.” With a scoff, she watched him scroll to the post, frowning as he saw it. His eyes were saucers as he read the whole post. When he looked up to Leah, his face matched the dread in her stomach.  
  
“It hasn’t been up that long,” Leah said. “Give me back my phone, I’ll report it.”  
  
Nick leaned over and handed her phone back. “We need to call Simon,” he said. “Who the hell would post something like that?”  
  
“Someone who doesn’t know how to use spell-check before they publically out someone,” Leah said, clicking through the mobile settings on her phone to report the post.  
  
“You think it’s true?”  
  
Leah paused and looked up to Nick. She didn’t answer him, and he said nothing else.  
  
Memories pushed their way to the front of Leah’s brain, rewriting them under the notion of her best friend not being straight. She thought of how badly his relationship with Anna crashed and burned. About how his relationship with Carys Seward was somehow worse. About his Daniel Radcliffe obsession. As her mind worked to put memories of Simon together with Nick’s question, she found herself unsurprised at the answer she gave him.  
  
“It could be.”  
  
Nick started to stand. “I guess that doesn't matter. We need to go tell him.”  
  
“They're doing family Christmas stuff all day,” Leah said. That was why Leah was at Nick’s on Christmas Eve. Her mom was at work and he was Jewish. It was a mini tradition of theirs. “Hang on.” Leah closed out the Tumblr app and opened a text message to Nora. _Are you guys busy right now._  
  
While she waited for Nora’s reply, Leah watched Nick’s fingers nervously tap his pants leg. He touched each finger to his pocket one at a time. Leah looked away when he looked up.  
  
Thankfully, Nora’s response came back almost immediately.  
  
_Obligatory family time is paused, y?_  
  
Leah shoved her phone in her pocket and stood. “We should go now. Like, right now.” She grabbed her hat and tugged it over her head.  
  
Nick nodded, and with a hollar to his parents that they were going for a walk, they both left the back door of Nick’s basement.  
  
Leah buried her hands in her sweatshirt pocket as they walked side by side. The air was cold against her face, and the feeling in her gut wouldn’t settle. Now that the idea of Simon being gay was in her brain, she couldn’t see any other truth.  
  
She wondered if there were clues about her like there were about Simon.  
  
Thankfully, the walk to Simon’s was quick. Leah slowed as they walked up the pathway to Simon’s front door. Nick did the same. They stepped up in tandem, and both turned to each other.  
  
“Are you going to knock?” Leah asked.  
  
Nick looked at her. “I – I usually just go in, but it’s Christmas? And – ”  
  
Leah bit her lip. “I’ll text him.” As soon as the message sent, Leah saw Bieber jump up to look out the window. She couldn’t help but smile when she saw him. “Hi, sweet one,” Leah said softly, waving through the window. Nick laughed from behind her when Bieber started jumping and whining. He was wagging his tail so dramatically, his whole body shook.  
  
From the window, Leah could see Simon grab Bieber’s collar. She pursed her lips when Simon awkwardly opened the door as Bieber struggled to get to them. Simon sighed at Bieber and pulled him back, presumably so they could come in.  
  
Leah looked at Simon. He didn’t seem upset at first glance, to say the least. Leah’s stomach turned again. Now that they were in front of Simon, she had no idea what to say to her best friend.  
  
Out of the corner of her eye, Leah saw Nick looking at her. Inside the house, Nora was looking over her laptop towards the door curiously.  
  
When she suggested a walk, Leah could tell Simon knew something was up right away. When he went to change, he released Bieber to greet them. Leah knelt down and peppered his nose with kisses. He turned to greet Nick, before moving right back to Leah. She buried her face in Bieber’s fur when she heard Simon coming back down the stairs.  
  
Leah could tell Nick was waiting for her to say something as they walked back down the path towards the sidewalk from Simon’s house. Same with Simon. She looked away from both of them and tugged her hat down more securely.  
  
Simon finally broke the silence when they got to the sidewalk. The entire exchange was awkward and uncomfortable. Nick was silent, except for his fearful glances to Leah everytime Simon spoke. Leah kind of wanted to punch him. He and Simon had been friends since they were four; she knew for a fact that they made it through plenty of uncomfortable conversations before this one.  
  
If they could survive learning about periods together, Nick could tell Simon about The Tumblr.  
  
When Nick said nothing, Simon – in a move that shocked no one – jumped to an incorrect conclusion.  
  
“Oh my gosh. You guys hooked up.”  
  
Leah knew her face was on fire. Of course, Simon asked _again_ , and Nick _still_ wasn’t saying anything. She bent down so she could hide her face in Bieber’s fur. She still remembered back in sixth grade when Simon blurted out, “Leah, why is your face so red?” after Jessie Chase came into class wearing a One Direction crop-top and cut off shorts. She was dress-coded before she could find a desk, but the memory still burned in Leah’s brain when she felt her cheeks heat up.  
  
Crushes were weird like that.  
  
Leah stood up and gave them both a curt goodbye. She refused to look at Nick. After giving Bieber another kiss goodbye, Leah walked away from them both. Neither one of them called out to her, so Leah headed straight for her car.  
  
Once she unlocked the driver side door and cranked up the heat, Leah pulled her phone out of her pocket. She pulled up her message thread with Simon and tried to think about how the hell she could type and send ‘ _go check the Tumblr_ ’ to him. It was so impersonal. From the rear view mirror, she could see Nick walking towards his house, and Simon walking the opposite direction with Bieber. He didn't tell Simon either. Leah shut her phone screen off. When Nick opened the door to her car a moment later, Leah jumped.  
  
“I am the worst best friend,” Nick said, leaning back into the passenger seat. “We’re the worst best friends.”  
  
“He speaks,” Leah said dryly.  
  
Nick dropped his head back against the seat. “Dude, I panicked.”  
  
_Dude_. Everything was fine. Normal. He wasn’t going to bring up Simon’s exclamation.  
  
Leah let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.  
  
“Obviously,” she said.  
  
“He knows something is up,” Nick said.  
  
“Also obvious,” Leah said. Nick made a frustrated noise, so Leah finally looked to him. “Look, I’ll call him when I get home.”  
  
She would text him. Eventually.  
  
Nick exhaled. “Do it right when you get home. I don’t want him to see it before we say something.”  
  
Leah nodded, and Nick left her car without another word.  
  
She didn’t call Simon when she got home.  
  
She didn’t call him.  
  
She texted Nora. _Call me asap._ It was dinner time and she knew the Spiers were doing more family tradition stuff, so her phone didn’t light up with Nora’s call until almost an hour later.  
  
“Hey,” Leah said as she shut her bedroom door. Her mom still wasn’t home, but she thought it was probably better to be safe. “Have you been on Tumblr today?”  
  
“No, I have been freaking glued to that fic you sent me,” Nora said, “I can’t believe – ”  
  
“Go on The Tumblr,” Leah interrupted.  
  
“Creeksecrets?” Nora asked. Leah made an affirming noise. She sat on the edge of her bed and listened while Nora opened her her laptop. Each click of her mouse was another thud of Leah’s heart in her chest.  
  
“Okayyy, I’m on The Tumblr,” Nora said. “Ty Allen is sleeping with Sheila Hughes. Is that what I _had_ to – ”  
  
Nora stopped talking, and Leah waited while she read the post.  
  
When she finally spoke, Nora’s voice was quiet, but firm. “Do you know who posted it?”  
  
“No.” She wanted to ask Nora if it was true, but she couldn’t bring herself to. If it was and Simon wanted her to know, he would have told her.  
  
The thought stung more than it probably should.  
  
“Is that why you texted me? Is – ” She was quiet for a second. “You didn’t tell him, did you? He was fine during French toast and he’s not listening to that shitty playlist right now.”  
  
“Nora, I need you to tell him over break,” Leah said. “Preferably soon, before he sees it.” She sighed heavily. This was going to ruin Simon’s Christmas, whether it was true or not. The Tumblr was horrible, but everyone at school believed it to be law.  
  
“Did you report it? It says it’s from ten this morning, how is it even still up there?” She heard Nora’s quick typing and clicking. “I reported it, and I just sent an anon to the admin, too.”  
  
“It’s Christmas, the person probably isn’t paying too much attention to that shithole website.” Leah heard her mom’s keys in their front door. “I have to go,” she said. After a beat, she added, “Thanks.”  
  
“Yeah.” Nora sighed. “Have a good Christmas, Leah.”  
  
Her mom knocked on her door just as Leah hung up with Nora.  
  
“Hey,” Leah said. “How was work?”  
  
“Long,” her mom said with a sigh. “What did you do today?” Her mom crossed her room and looked to her bed. Leah grabbed her backpack and a random drumstick and shoved them both onto the floor so she could sit.  
  
“Hung out with Nick,” Leah said. “Played some video games.”  
  
She smiled, and Leah saw the tired circles under her eyes. “Were Simon and Abby there?”  
  
Leah tried not to scrunch her nose at her mom’s mention of Abby.  
  
“Simon had family stuff going on all day,” she answered. “And, I honestly do not care what Abby did today.” Her mom smiled, and Leah rolled her eyes. “I don't.”  
  
“Okay, okay,” her mom said. “Who were you on the phone with?”  
  
“Nora,” Leah said, “band stuff.”  
  
Her mom nodded. “Wanna come out in the living room and watch some crappy Christmas movies? I brought food home.”  
  
Leah’s phone buzzed in her hand. Nora. _I showed him._ She looked back up to her mom. “Sure, I'll be right out.”  
  
Her mom squeezed her shoulder and left her room. Leah unlocked her phone and sent Nora a text full of question marks.  
  
Nora’s reply came quickly. _He's processing. I think he's in shock._  
  
Leah frowned. She knew she should have been the one to tell him, but at least now he knew about it. Leah didn’t know how to reply, and Nora didn’t text her again. She fidgeted with the volume buttons on her phone for a second, before opening her message thread with Simon.  She typed, _when you find out who posted it, let me know and we’ll cut their tires._ After a beat, she deleted the message.  
  
_I’m here if you need to talk_. Leah cringed. She sounded fake. Clearly, Simon felt like he couldn’t talk to her about it. Which also stung. She deleted that message too.  
  
There was nothing she could say that would be good enough. The same feeling of being replaced twisted in her thoughts. _Simon didn’t need her for this either._ After quickly changing into comfy pajamas, Leah shoved her phone in her sweatshirt pocket and went to join her mom for their own Christmas.  
  
In the living room, Leah plastered on a smile when she saw her mom setting out forks on the coffee table.  
  
“Everything okay?” her mom asked as Leah sat quietly.  
  
She always knew.  
  
“Not really,” Leah said. The words came out shaky and high pitched. Her eyes started prickling. The fork in her mother’s hand clattered to the table. Silently, her mom sat next to her and pulled her into a hug. Leah let her. She sniffled softly while her mother hummed to her. Leah couldn’t bring herself to tell her mother what was happening, and she was grateful her mother didn’t ask.  
  
They both jumped when Leah’s phone buzzed in her sweatshirt pocket. She was expecting Nora or even Simon, so she blinked in surprise when she saw Abby’s name on the call screen. Her first thought was to ignore it, but she hit the green button anyway.  
  
“I’ll be right back,” she told her mom, extracting herself from the couch. Leah wiped her eyes and cleared her throat before bringing the phone to her ear. “Hello?”  
  
“Hi,” Abby said quickly, “I’m really sorry to call you so late on Christmas Eve like this, but, um… have you talked to Simon today?” Leah could hear the fear and sadness in her voice, and as much as she wanted to hate it, she was more concerned about Simon than whatever was between her and Abby.  
  
“His sister is with him. He knows about the post.”  
  
Abby let out a long sigh of relief. “Oh my god, I was so worried. I texted him like five times and he didn’t answer.” She heard Abby’s shaky, uncomfortable laugh. Leah cringed. She knew it probably wasn’t easy for Abby to call her, even in a situation like this. “Sorry,” she added after a second.  
  
“It’s okay,” Leah said, her voice coming out softer than she intended. “I have to go, though.”  
  
“Right, yeah,” Abby said. After a second, she added, “Merry Christmas, Leah.”  
  
Leah's cheeks felt warm. “You too, Abby.”

**Author's Note:**

> Lines and scenes you recognize, including, _“Oh my gosh. You guys hooked up.”_ belong to the absolutely wonderful Becky Albertalli.


End file.
